If you are on the other side of your fertility journey, this post is for you. First of all – congratulations! Were there times when you didn’t think you’d ever get here? I know that feeling.
Whether you built your family through assisted medical treatment, natural remedies, adoption, surrogacy, or have decided to remain childless it wasn’t an easy road. You probably cried many tears, overcame disappointment time and time again, picked yourself up and started over again. And you learned more than you ever thought you’d need to know about your body, human reproduction, the myriad of options available to build families, and the professionals and support systems that help you get there.
So what now? What do you do with this unexpected depth of knowledge? Here are some ideas:
Share your story
If you weren’t “public” about your journey as you were going through it, consider opening up a bit now. You can share with a friend who is on her own journey, offer to share with your clinic, or share more broadly online in a forum, blog post, or even a podcast like Beat Infertility, The Fertility Podcast, or Your Fertility Hub. I also welcome stories on my own blog at MyFertilityCoach.com!
And, if you’re reading this you are probably already serving as a mentor with Fruitful Fertility. What a gift your time and experience will be to the person you are matched with.
Be considerate – and encourage others to do the same
Remember the anger (rage, maybe?) and sadness you felt when you heard someone complain about their pregnancy? Remember the ache of hearing someone go on and on (and on and on) about their nursery when you were in a “safe” place like the fertility clinic or your acupuncture office? Now is your chance to be the change you wished to see at that time.
Avoid complaining about your pregnancy to someone who may be facing a fertility challenge. If you can, avoid complaining about it at all. Consider the fact that others would do just about anything to be in your shoes. And be aware of your surroundings…if you are in a place you frequented while you were trying to get pregnant, be sensitive to the fact that women who are there now are also in that place. You don’t need to hide or temper your joy – just be considerate and compassionate.
Donate your medical supplies and medication
If you have leftover medication, don’t let it go to waste. Pay it forward by donating to your clinic or to another woman in your area who needs it. Make sure to check the expiration dates!
Maintain your self-care habits
If you are now parenting, you know it can be hard. It’s also joyful and fun and gratifying – but it has moments of exhaustion and exasperation. There may be days you feel despair and overwhelmed.
If you aren’t parenting, there will be another circumstance that leaves you feeling defeated. That’s life (unfortunately).
Rather than be crushed by this new situation, remember the skills you gained during your fertility journey. How did you pause to care for yourself when you were TTC? Did you make a point to just breathe, to focus on maintaining a healthy body, to practice positive affirmations? Pull out those tools to help you find more peace in whatever turn your path takes next.
What else would you suggest for those living life post-infertility? What is the biggest lesson from your journey that continues to serve you now?